Tonight...

Hey guys... So the "blogging machine" plan didn't work out but now it's summer and I'm back!

ANYWAYS!

For the past year since I have graduated from Fountainview, I have changed dramatically. Some for the good, some for the not-so-good. However, I am trying to figure out who I want to be. If there is one thing I can honestly say that I am thankful for, it's my boyfriend, Tyler Lee Cockerill. We have had some really excellent times and some really hard times, but I am very convinced that there's a reason he's stayed in my life... Many reasons.

I write about Tyler tonight mostly because I miss him... A lot. He left for Basic Combat Training at Fort Jackson in Columbia, SC yesterday. It was a scary, terrible, aching feeling watching him pass through security at the airport and it hasn't really gotten better since he left.

We met about 9.5 months ago on our first day of Freshman English class at the University of Kentucky. I came to class late (shocker right? lol) and decided that the most appealing seat in the room would be beside a shy-looking cutie and an arrogant fraternity guy (who I was sure wouldn't talk to me anyway). The "shy-looking cutie" was none other than my beloved boyfriend, Tyler. Our teacher made us play an ice-breaker game where you have to find out the-person-next-to-you's name, where they're from, their major, their favorite hobby, etc. and then introduce them to the class. I ended up introducing Tyler to the class. And in case you're curious, he's from Louisville, his major is Nursing and his favorite hobby is basketball :) We got to talking about his major (as I am also studying Nursing) and found out that we had 4 of our 6 classes TOGETHER! I had no clue where I was going - while Tyler's big brother Josh had previously attended UK - so I asked Tyler where our next class was. He gave me vague directions but we were walking the same way so I figured I couldn't get too lost. I had to stop at the bike rack though because I took my bike everywhere, until I noticed that Tyler was waiting for me. He said something about not being sure if he pointed me in the right direction, so he said I could follow him to the right street and then I'd find my way. He was quite surprised when I walked my bike all the way there! We talked about everything and laughed our heads off all the way there, then sat together in class. He went from seeming a little nervous about talking to me to laughing like we'd been friends for years. We were both starving after the anatomy lecture, so we went to Jamba Juice together after class. Eventually he walked me to my ride and asked for my number. And the rest is pretty much history. We've been laughing, hanging out and falling in love ever since.

We had discussed religion a few times. Tyler and I both had amazing grandfather's involved in our lives, and we both had been through losing those amazing men. Tyler's grandpa was his example of Jesus and the main religious influence in his life. I got caught up in other things over the summer and in college, so it wasn't a big deal to me that Tyler wasn't "Adventist" as long as he was a Christian. We started discussing Fountainview and how I felt about backsliding after graduation and whatnot and he seemed genuinely interested in my beliefs. And that's another way that I fell even deeper in love with him... He supports me, even now, in getting back on track. We read our bibles together and one of the last things he said before he got on his plane to Basic Combat Training was "Don't forget to pray lots!". The last night that he was home, we read a chapter or two from Matthew and I bawled my eyes out. Tyler isn't just a boyfriend - he inspires me to be a better person. A lot of people see him in a lot of different ways, but I know Ty. He's caring, hilarious, compassionate, loyal (to a fault!), respectful, quirky, shy around people he doesn't really know but open when you get to know him. I'm not saying he's perfect, but I am definitely saying that he's perfect for me. He loves his sleep and is a real bear if he doesn't get enough of it, but that's life. He gets his feelings hurt and won't hesitate to fight back, but who doesn't? But he's quick to apologize, quick to say "I love you", he can tell when I need a hug and he's quick to give a lot of them. He knows me more than anyone else does, in such a different way than anyone else. And he loves me for me - not for what most teenage guys "love" girls for. Do we fight? Absolutely. Do we act immature sometimes? You betcha. But at the end of the day, missing him is still the reason that I'm laying here crying tonight and writing about him. Because I want everyone to know about the incredible young man that I get to call my Soldier.

Dear God,
Please keep my soldier safe. He's homesick, lonely, enduring physical hardship, and trying to get through this training in the allotted time so that he can come home. I miss him so much but I know that You gave me him, so help me be strong for him. Thank You for being there for him when I can't be, and please help him lean on You and get to know You better through this hard time. Help him to know that I am thinking of him, I miss him, and I love him very much. This next 3 months will be really hard on us, but help us to be not just Army Strong, but Jesus Strong. I'm sorry for all the times I've screwed up and chose other things above You. Help Tyler and me to gain a better relationship with You and a deeper dependence on You this summer. Thanks for hearing me and again, for being with him when I can't. I love you both very much. In Jesus' name, Amen.

WOW! 2013!

Okay so... (quite obviously) After I came home from my boarding school in Canada I kind of let my blog go. But NOT FOR LONG, my friends! I am back and I am going to be a blogging machine because, well, I really enjoy blogging! Plus - I have so much to update you all on!! Living at home, college, boyfriend, new friends, new hobbies... MERCY! The list goes on and on. Anyways. More later because I have LOTS of homework to do tonight before I can play on my blog... As much as I would love to pour my heart and soul into a new post :) Miss you all! Talk to you very soon!! :)

And for your troubles - here's 3 super cute pictures of the boyfriend and I at our very first UK basketball game last night!! :D FYI - UK won 75-65 against the Tennessee Vols ;)

Senior!

Well, my parents will be here the day after tomorrow. The tent guys came and set up the overflow tents on the cafeteria lawn today. I took my cap and gown pictures this past Sunday, and graduation festivities will begin this Friday night. It's hard to believe that I am almost done with high school! It seems like yesterday that I was in the 5th grade and worshipped the ground the "big kids" walked on. How time flies!

I have recently decided that I will, in fact, miss Fountainview Academy. There are some things that I will gladly leave behind, but there are many people that I will carry in my heart as I go. I have learned so much about my Savior here, and about the Bible, and what it means to call myself a Christian.

I have also recently realized how absolutely terrifying this whole graduating thing is. I will be forced out of my comfy little Fountainview haven into the world that doesn't give a crap whether I live or die... Unless my death will make an interesting story for CNN - but even then, my death is mere ENTERTAINMENT, not tragedy.

I am not quite sure if I am ready spiritually to leave this place. I'm a baby Christian, no doubt. Would you kick your 2 year old toddler out of the house, just because it's potty trained? That's how I feel right about now... Like I'm just now figuring out how to stand on my two feet, but I'm being pushed out into the world where I'll be expected to run full speed ahead.

My biggest priority when I go home will be having my devotions every morning. Here lately it's been virtually impossible for me to have them... I'm SO busy packing, studying for finals, and trying to avoid combusting spontaneously due to the sheer excitement coursing through my veins. I haven't been home in 5 and a half months! I haven't hugged my parents, punched my sisters or slept in my own  bed for almost half a year! Crazy. So I am VERY excited. Just a little nervous about this whole growing up thing.

If you guys wouldn't mind, I'd really appreciate your prayers as I graduate. I'm going to a public university so that I can live at home (and avoid owing my first born child to student loans). I know that God has the strength to take me through it, I'm just a bit nervous that I'll have the strength to trust Him.

I love you all and I'll miss you, Fountainview Academy class of 2012! 5 more days till we walk across that stage and get our diplomas! YAY!

And for old times sake:

My parents arrive - 1 day 23 hours and 45 minutes
Commencement Ceremony begins - 4 days 17 hours 15 minutes
FINALLY HOME - 5 days 21 hours 45 minutes

Countdown :]

Memories night - Tomorrow night!
Jr./Sr. Camp Out - Day after tomorrow!
Parents Arrive - 14 days 21 hours 6 minutes!
Graduation Ceremony - 17 days 15 hours 36 minutes!

I have enjoyed being a senior... But I have this hunch that I will LOVE being at home even more!!! :) It's been 5 months since I've been able to hug my mom, drive around town singing Journey at the top of my lungs with daddy, or read my sisters' minds with one quick glance... For the love of family traditions, southern drawls and country music - I'm comin' home ASAP!!!!! :)

COUNTDOWN! :)

Jr/Sr Campout - 7 days 13 hours

Family comes - 20 days 21 hours 43 minutes

Commencement ceremony - 23 days 15 hours 13 minutes

Countdown

22 days 21 hours 50 minutes till my family gets here...

25 days 15 hours 20 minutes till Commencement starts :)

Updated Countdown ;)

Junior/Senior Campout: 20 days 16 hours

Parents come: 4 weeks 6 days 50 minutes

Graduation Ceremony begins: 36 days 18 hours 20 minutes